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The Last Excuse

If there is a hell
It filters through its neverending shades of green
And when it turns on those rains
it mutes it all to grey

If there is a hell
Its only life support is an idle screen
But to unplug is to spill a restless world at unset knees

If there is a hell
It always stares back through the same new cracks
And its every face seems worn and stale and overplayed

If there is a hell
It rings through wires and into my head
It asks me where and how and why I just don't try

But how can I explain
When all I've been is blinded
These words do talk
These heads do turn
But yet it's probably worthless

I'm not the one
I didn't want this
And whether it's chemical, emotional, physical
It doesn't mean shit

If there is a hell
There must be a heaven
And if just once
It shined right through
Perhaps I'd try
But it's only there
So the mind can fake it
And it seems that
All its innocence
Has all but drowned
And sometimes it calls
Through the submerged distance
And as its glimmers
Fade to black
The depths seem undone
But the only way to dive
Is through their engines
And while they always take the plunge
I've learned to stand aside
And leave them to collide

Since
I'm not the one
I didn't want this

And there is a hell
I had it all made


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